I’m feeling pretty good right now.
HoBiscuit and I closed on our very first apartment yesterday and we couldn’t be happier. I mean, we’ve sold off all of our blood, replacing it with Fluffer-Nutter in order to make the final down payment, but still we think it was worth it. Especially around snack time when we use small knives to cut ourselves and bleed onto toast and crackers.
Mmmm, love that Fluffer-Nutter goodness…
Now that we have our very own place to live however, we’ve found that it just doesn’t look or feel exactly the way we KNOW it could look and feel with a little remodeling. Especially the kitchen, which is soooo small that we won’t both be able to work in it at the same time without one of us crawling into the oven to let the other pass by.
Just guess who’ll be getting into the oven.
Anywaste, we’ve decided that the best thing to do is remodel the kitchen and leave the rest of the place alone for now. Mostly because after checking our nonexistent budget and exploring other methods of raising cash we’ve come to realize that selling off body parts no longer brings the premiums they once did, which means we can’t afford to do anything but the kitchen until the market price of human spleens goes back up.
Damn you ebay.
All of which brings us back to yesterday’s question. Everyone assumed I was asking if it was better for a PERSON to look good or to feel good, when I was really wondering if it was better for a PLACE to look good or to feel good. See? I can be clever and enigmatic with the best of them. Face it, I’m smarter than any of you and you’re all feeling inferior to my obviously greater intelligence! I’m a genius living amongst cavemen! I’m like a virtuoso stuck in a polka band, an Einstein forced to ride the short bus, or a Picasso made to paint Pokemon cards!
…
Why are you looking at me like that?
*smack!*
Ow!
See?! This is exactly why I don’t talk at parties.
congrats on the new pad! it gives me hope that after our wedding lunacy ends next year that hell may freeze over sometime after that the FatDude and I just might be able to afford to buy instead of dropping all our $ into the black hole of rent :)
It may have a small kitchen, but all that counts is that it has a room for me.
It’s not the size of the kitchen… wait…um…yeah, actually size matters. Sorry. You’re screwed unless you get HoBiscuit some “appliances” to supplement your small “kitchen”…
TOASTER OVEN.
Famous last line, “We’ll just remodel the kitchen. Nothing else.” It doesn’t stop there… the light fixture next to the kitchen must match the curtain rods that must match the moulding in the living/family/hallway/bedroom/foyer/bathroom! Oh, and btw plain ‘ole paint will never ever do! It’s gotta have “texture”, depth, EMOTION! Then when it’s almost all done. The NEWTREND says whatever you did is so un-new (not old, just not new) and the circle begins again. Trading Spaces, Broken House Chronicles, Sensibly Chic, Divine Design, Curb Appeal, Designer’s Challenge, While You Were Out, Hometime, This Old House, Bob Vila Weekend Warriors- All Evil, Evil Shows, sucking the $$ from our wallets, giving us boo-boos from errant hammers, pliers, mild jolts of electricity, the aroma of sewer gas clinging to our nose hairs, and sweat marks resembling the Blessed Mother on our natal cleft.
Oh, I’m installing crown moulding this weekend. Care to help? One thing I’ve learned from being a home-owe-ner, try it on someone else’s house before destroying yours. Congrats!
my a-comment stands