An Apology

On Sunday a whole bunch of my friends came over to my place just to hangout. One of my friends brought up the fact that my computer is very, very old and thus I deserved to be ridiculed for having the audacity to call myself a mighty geek. He and some of my other friends proceeded to make fun of me for the next half hour, calling me names like The Mighty Weak and GeekMan The Meek.

Yeah, my friends are really original.

My friend then said that he happened to have a few old computer parts in his bag and would I like to have them for my computer. Of course, I asked what he had knowing full well that anything would be better than my pathetic six year old Pentium II 300. Amazingly, my friend just happened to be carrying a motherboard, 256MB of RAM, and a Pentium 3 with him for no other reason than to impress any women he might run into in a bar.

And that should tell you all you need to know about my friends.

It took less than five minutes for all the men to be in my computer room working on the computer and all the women to be in the living room watching the Golden Globe Awards on TV. Within ten minutes my computer was and pieces. Fifteen minutes later, we were all standing around trying to figure out why my computer would no longer work. It was at that moment that I remembered the last time I backed up my files was six months ago.

I got so scared I think I peed, just a little, in my pants.

It took about two hours, but we did get my computer to boot and all the software working properly except of course, the modem, which for some reason the computer didn’t recognize. We tried removing it, uninstalling the drivers, re-installing the drivers and even sacrificing a small goat at an impromptu shrine to Bill Gates, but nothing worked. We decided that the best way to tackle this puzzling conundrum was to play cards and drink heavily until one of us came up with a solution.

My friends left me at midnight and I am still modemless.

Luckily, I have this beautiful, wonderful, fully functional laptop with which to sign on the Internet and update my site. Unfortunately, it took me a while to get it set up properly, which forced me to miss my usual Monday afternoon post. I should be back to my normal posting schedule Friday.

Be afraid.

16 Comments

  1. The more geeks you have in a room, the more likely they will leave your computer worse than they found it.

    I didnt see it mentioned, but you might want to try getting the latest drivers for that modem.

    I have other tips for you, but by the time I call, you’ll probably be fixed.

    Sometimes parts are just wanky and dont want to work. Try getting a 3DFX card to run OpenGL apps under windozeXP.. (which I did) HA! ^_^

    Of course, the last thing you want to hear is that the MB/Modem combo is incompatible and you need a new modem. Wouldnt that just suck?

    Later, Not-so-Mighty Geek!

  2. Here’s a joke I just thought up. “How many Geeks does it take to fix a computer?”

    Unfortunately I haven’t thought of a punch-line, but maybe someone else can…

  3. Punchline:

    “We weren’t trying to fix it man, we were trying to make it faster…”

  4. Damn, I wish I had your friends. I mean, I sort of do, but none of them are carrying spare processors around with them. Wish they were, I’m ashamed to say what *I’ve* got running – let’s just say my computer is four years old, and leave it at that.

    And what kind of wussy women are you hanging out with? I’d have had my hands in the machine with the rest of you.

    But damn.

  5. Personally, I take cursing Bill Gates as an art form. My computer bitches me out everytime I try to tinker with it.

  6. Am I the only one to congratulate you on being a Bloggie finalist? What kind of friends have you got!?

    Very, very well done, GM, and not only do you get my vote, but I’ve instructed all my readers to do likewise.

  7. the thought of a regular posting schedule is novel to me…. i would always just post whenever my brain could no longer hold a thought i was harboring.

  8. The Credo got all my votes, one for each e-mail address. And The Pix too and she’s been collecting e-mail addresses since ’92.

    There’s nothing worse than when a bunch of geeks happen to be in the presence of a broken piece of technology. I tried fixing the ATM at the nearest bank rather than walk another block to the one that worked, but then, I also qualify for Mighty Geek Status (when you get around to changing the link that is)

  9. Thank you all for the votes of confidence. I’m truly flattered that people actually liked what I wrote, ‘winning’ would just be icing at this point.

    Thank you all.

  10. Damn! What kind of guy just carries that sort of hardware around? What kind? Well, the kind of guy I am looking for… why can’t some guy just woo me with his geekness and make my life complete? *sigh* At least I have you … the Mighty Geek. YOU ROCK. Yes, indeed… you rock.

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