September | 2003 | The Mighty Geek

I’m going fricking nuts.

This week is all about the Mighty Wedding Invitations, so I have almost no time whatsoever for anything HoBiscuit considers unnecessary or off-topic. You know, things like eating, sleeping or breathing all take a backseat to the construction of the perfect wedding invitation, especially when we (read: I) need to finish them before the end of the month. In fact, the only way I’ve been able to get on the web at all has been by secretly tapping into my previously latent psychic abilities and warping the time/space continuum in such a way as to halt time long enough to properly wordsmith this missive without letting HoBiscuit find out what I was doing.

So if anyone tells HoBiscuit that I Blogged today, I’m a dead man.

BTW, anyone know any good love poems and/or travel poems that are wedding invitation worthy? I’ve come up with a great design for the invitations but I need a love poem about marriage and a love poem about travel for it, and I can’t seem to find any good ones anywhere on the web.

Excuse me while I use this spoon to pop my left eyeball out of my skull and then squash it in my own fist.

Also, if you are a hairy man in need of sleep, do not attempt to light your farts to impress your mate and/or friends. Explaining the four alarm fire engulfing your entire neighborhood to the fire marshal is neither a fun, nor an enjoyable, experience, no matter how loud the laughter is from your so-called ‘friends’. It is especially un-fun when you are completely covered in third degree burns and every hair on your body has melted into the top layer of your skin making you look like a giant talking mound of flesh-colored wax.

And technically, you were working with flammable materials in a confined area so when the fire marshal gives you a ticket, don’t act so surprised.

Don’t ask. Just trust me on this one, k?

I’m back.

There are still a few problems that I haven’t worked out yet, the most glaring of which is that this site now looks like crap on a Mac, but on the whole I’m pretty happy with my new design. Why don’t you take a quick look around and tell me about all the bugs I’m sure you’ll find in my horrendous code.

Hey, I’m a designer. Not a hacker.

Anywaste, since my hacking skills are so pathetically stunted that fourth graders regularily mock me as I walk the streets in my blue silk bathrobe while reading “HTML For Schmucks” and mumbling to myself, I’d like to take this opportunity to beg for some help. If anyone out there is willing to help me out, I’d really appreciate it.

My problems are twofold.

The first, and most important problem, is that I can’t seem to get this page to render correctly on the Mac. I don’t know why because as far as I can tell it looks fine to everyone on a PC. The way it’s supposed to look is like this;

The problem is that the top blue bar seems to be missing when viewed on a Mac and the little corner icons of my side bar aren’t in their proper place. They’re coming in one line below making everything ugly.

The second problem is not so big. If you’re using IE 5.5 or above, then the scroll bar should be a light grey like the background of my content boxes. But on the main page it isn’t, even though if you look at my “About” page it is grey. And before you ask, yes the code is EXACTLY the same on the About page and my home page.

So, to sum up; “Won’t someone help a brother out?”

*** Update: Another problem is that one can no longer highlight text properly. Damn, I suck at coding. ***

Month: September 2003

Design Of A Decade

All Things Old Are New Again