Dear Self,
The next time you feel the urge to forcibly squeeze out that reluctant fart you feel hiding in your anal passageway, make damn sure it’s actually a fart before you ecstatically, and perhaps a tad over-enthusiastically, begin tensing your sphincter muscles.
Remember, you cannot ‘CTRL+Z’ in real life.
Supplemental reminder; Always carry a small package of tissues with you at all times. That and clean underwear will ensure that there will never be a repeat of “The Horrifying Elevator Fiasco Of ‘03” ever again.
Head, meet oven. Oven, this is my head.
I really hope you made that up. If not, you deserve what you get for trying to sully the air of an elevator. ;)
Why did I just read that?! Oy.
Sometimes it’s those ‘lil innocent ones you’re sure is it’s just gas…..
You gambled, you lost…
I’m setting here laughing so hard that I almost had messed myself. NOT
It is funny though.
:)
Dearest geek,
remove thy head from thy oven and insert thy ass if it is the member that has so offended you.
Yep, there goes lunch!
Oh. My. God.
How did I stumble into this journal?