Sticky Situation

I’m in sticky note hell.

Sticky note on TV:
“Taping movies for my sister. Do NOT use TV.”

Sticky note on bed:
“Bed is made perfectly for family visit. Do NOT sleep.”

Sticky note on fridge:
“Saving food for family visit. Do NOT eat.”

Sticky note on bathroom:
“Bathroom has been cleaned for family visit. Do NOT dirty.”

Sticky note on laundry basket:
“Do laundry, or big trouble.”

So I can’t watch TV, eat, sleep, or use the bathroom in my own house. Well, thank the lord I can still do the frickin laundry! Oh, but my life wouldn’t be worth living if I couldn’t do the laundry and thus please my significant other! How else can your loyal servant please you, Your Highness? Shall I rub your feet, My Queen? Maybe I should just bend over and grab my ankles? Would you prefer KY, Crisco or no lubrication at all as you shove your royal foot up my…

Hey, what’s this? Hmmm, I guess I missed this note on the computer…

Sticky note on computer:
“Remember, I read your stupid Blog. Do NOT Blog this or you’re in BIG TROUBLE.”

Dammit.