Pressed For Words

I’m starting a new PhotoBlog.

Wow, just writing that for the entire world to see is exciting in a “major loser coming out of the nerd-boy closet” kind of way. I’m actually tingling all over in awe of my own Geekiness. And right this very second, as I type these words out, I’m smiling in a cheesy consolation-prize-winning-game-show-contestant way. I could be wrong, but I also think my nipples are hard.

Yep. Hard like little, hot, pink diamonds.

Anywaste, in order to do this new site justice, I’ve gone out and designed a brand new website, complete with its own URL and all the other Geeky stuff that you don’t really care about. However, since I didn’t want to use MovableType as the main Blogging tool for this new PhotoBlog, I decided to give WordPress a try and installed it on this new site of mine.

Because I’m so cutting edge like that, yo.

Now, here’s the thing. I don’t know diddly about WordPress. I’ve read all the info on it and it seems pretty straight-forward when it comes to designing templates and themes and everything, but I can’t seem to wrap my tired mind around the conceptual discussions about WordPress themes that I’m reading on the web. Which is basically my way of saying that I understand, in theory, what I’m supposed to do to make WordPress look the way I want, but I don’t seem to be able to implement the design properly in practice.

Which is where YOU come in.

I’m looking for someone who can explain to me by example how to make my PhotoBlog design into a WordPress theme so that I can then create other themes in the future. I’m not looking for a tutorial about WordPress themes on the web (read them), or for a technical jargon infused dissertation about how the guts of WordPress works (read those, too). I just want someone who can look at my design and then explain to me, through email and/or IM sessions, how to take that design and make it into a WordPress theme, without my having to learn PHP. I want to learn how to create WP themes so that I can make them available for EVERYONE to use whether they understand the inner workings of WordPress, PHP, HTML, CSS or not.

I know people are doing this, I just need to learn how.

And, as a reward for helping me learn the proper way to create WP themes, I would then create for you a WP theme for your Blog. That’s right, help me and I’ll try to make your site look pretty… or prettier. Or not so Blogger-template ugly. Whatever. Hey, it’s a free site redesign by a guy who makes a nice living doing graphic design work for big companies. Who knows? You might even like the new design enough to use it! So, if you’re interested in giving me a hand please email me at geekman(at-symbol)themightygeek.com.

So, who wants to help me out?