I’m Not Really Here…

Don’t let the Queen know, but I’m being bad.

You see, I’m supposed to be unpacking the boxes labeled ‘Office Supplies’ and ‘Stupidly Heavy Books’ but I’m not. Instead, I’m sitting here in my box covered office writing an entry for my site that she will most likely read five minutes after I post it. Then she’ll call me to say I shouldn’t be wasting my time like this. That I should be busy unpacking. That I should be trying to make life easier, instead of harder. The quicker we unpack, she would say, the sooner I can get back to my silly online hobby. But you know what I say? I say, “When the boss is away the bad boys will procrastinate all day.”

And I’m a baaaaad boy.

Oh well, maybe I should get back to unpacking. What to do, what to do… Hey! I wonder what’s in this box labeled ‘Toy’s – Do Not Open’? I like toys, especially my expensive electronic ones, but I don’t remember packing this box. And that doesn’t look like my handwriting, either. Well, let me get the box cutters and we’ll see what’s inside, no?

What the..?

These aren’t toys! There’s nothing in here but batteries and some Sharper Image personal massagers! They’re not even the good personal massagers, either. These are the little ones with the funny shapes that you need to be double jointed to use on your back. I hate these! I don’t remember buying them though, so that means they must be HoBiscuits and that means…

Oh.

I’m a baaaaad boy.

8 Comments

  1. If any of you watch Sex & The City, you might recognise these blurbs:

    Woman/Customer #1: *holding up a wand like massager* Will this one hurt?
    Samantha: It will burn.
    Woman/Customer #1: Even through panties?
    Samantha: Even through ski pants.

    Woman/Customer #2: This is a neck and back massager, right?
    Samantha: Not if you mount it. :-)

  2. If any of you watch Sex & The City, you might recognise these blurbs:

    Woman/Customer #1: *holding up a wand like massager* Will this one hurt?
    Samantha: It will burn.
    Woman/Customer #1: Even through panties?
    Samantha: Even through ski pants.

    Woman/Customer #2: This is a neck and back massager, right?
    Samantha: Not if you mount it. :-)

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