Announcements

Overheard

• by GeekMan • In Announcements •   7

I heard this last night in the hotel lobby.

Man 1: “… her out.”
Man 2: “Really?”
Woman: “I can’t believe it!”
Man 1: “Yeah, I don’t know who’s going to replace her, but I guess someone finally realized she couldn’t handle the work.”
Woman: “Or maybe she just pissed someone off…”
Man 2: “Was there anyone she didn’t piss off?”
[laughter]
Man 3: “What’s so funny?”
Woman: “Did you hear about Linda?”
Man 3: “Linda? My boss, Linda?”
Man 1: “Yeah, they fired her today back at the office. Escorted her from the building and everything.”
Man 3: “Really?!”
Man 2: “Really.”
Man 3: “Is this a joke?”
Woman: “No. She’s really gone. According to what we know she wasn’t even allowed to download anything from her computer.”
Man 3: “Holy crap.”
Man 1: “Who are you calling?”
Man 3: “Linda.”
Woman: “Why?”
Man 3: “Hold on a sec. Hey, Linda it’s James. Did you just get fired? Really? Wow. No, no. I just wish someone had told me earlier so I could throw a “Ding-Dong the Bitch is Gone” party. Have a nice life. Buh-bye.”
[GeekMan spits his ice water out of his nose]

I guess Linda really wasn’t a very nice person.

On the Road Again

• by GeekMan • In Announcements, Traveling •   2

Yep, time to get my sorry buttocks to the airport.

I’m headed to San Diego today for work… again. Sigh, I never thought I’d ever think of traveling as boring, but man I am so bored of packing/unpacking, airports, airplanes and hotels. I just want to stay home and play with my daughter and dog, is that really so much to ask for?

[cracking thunder of doom]

Huh, I guess that means, “Yes.”

Router Wood?

• by GeekMan • In Breaking News •   2

I never imagined this day would ever arrive.

Who would have ever thought the humble network router would actually become “sexy”? I can’t remember ever sitting around dreaming up ways to improve my router to make it better, sleeker or sexier. While it’s true that on occasion I’ve railed against slow routers, or routers with connection problems, I don’t think I’ve ever waxed poetic over their aesthetics or bells and whistles. Mostly because in the past routers have been nothing more than little boxes with lights that you plug your computers and modems into so you can get online.

But that’s all changed now.

Because now I have seen the D-Link Xtreme N DIR-685 and my nipples have exploded with pleasure. It has everything I ever wanted (and never knew I wanted) in a router including a built in harddrive option and an LCD screen! I could BitTorrent without leaving my computer on all night! I could use the LCD to see the weather, or a news ticker or even to display a photo slideshow like a digital photo frame right on the router itself! And the best part is I wouldn’t have to hide it in the closet because it actually looks “cool”. If I weren’t so cautious due to my past hatred of D-Link routers I’d be all over this.

Oh D-Link, please redeem yourself to me and make this puppy awesome!

Crazy Thought of the Day #328,502,153,415

• by GeekMan • In Labracollie, Quickie •   1

Just a random thought.

Do dogs think elevators are magic transporters? I mean, from their perspective you walk into a tiny, metal room and a few moments later you leave that room and you’re miraculously somewhere else! They have no real concept of mechanisms, machinery or vertical movement brought about by pressing a button. I imagine if we could see their thought bubbles they’d go a little something like this;

“Holy crap, it’s the magic room! I don’t wanna die!”
“Please, don’t let us get vaporized this time Master, I just need to go potty!”
“Master doesn’t look scared, maybe there’s nothing to worry…”
“OMG! We’re stopping! But it’s too soon! What’s going on?!”
“Who are these people? Where are we? Should I get out? Should I stay?”
“Maybe I’ll just cower in the corner and quietly pee on myself…”

Dogs are so awesome.

Who Let The Dogs Out?

• by GeekMan • In Announcements, Family, Geek Life •   0

I must be a masochist.

I say that because even though I have a 1 year old little girl, a job that requires frequent and extended travel away from home, a portfolio that has been soundly trashed by the crashing markets AND a loving wife who has never in her life had a pet of any kind, we decided to adopt a dog. And not just any dog, no. THAT would be far too easy. So of course we had to adopt the cutest dog we could find at the shelter that just happened to be a mix of Labrador Retriever and Border Collie, which shall henceforth be known as a “Labracollie”.

I liked it better than Border Retriever.

For those who may not know, Border Collies are fricking SMART. And active. Very, very active. And Labs are also pretty active and need constant attention. Add into this mix that Trixie (yeah, yeah, yeah) is only about 3 months old and completely NOT housetrained and you can probably understand why I’m so scattered right now. I’ll post pics as soon as I can, but suffice it to say that both Trixie and The Mighty Baby get along pretty great so far and Trixie is fast becoming a great addition to the family.

Even with all the poop and pee. Ew.

What’s the Deal?

• by GeekMan • In Quickie •   2

I keep writing posts but about halfway through I get bogged down and just stop. Right now there are 16 half-written posts waiting in WordPress for me to finish them. I think I need someone to give my creative juices a swift kick in the butt.

HEY! That was supposed to be a rhetorical kick! Ow!

Drool…

• by GeekMan • In Announcements •   3

I got a new monitor.

It’s hard to write at the moment, possibly because each letter I type is about three inches tall on my new 26″ Planar PX2611w monitor because I can’t get my computer to properly sync with it. For some silly reason it keeps defaulting to 1280×720, which makes everything on the screen HUGE!

Wow, writing in all caps DOES hurt.

Anywaste, now that I have this monster I’m looking forward to working on the computer more since everything will be so much… bigger. Bigger is gooder. Mmmm… juicy bigness. Must resist urge to fondle giant monitor…

Man, this thing is huge.

OK, after futzing around I figured out what the problem is, and it suxxors to be me. Apparently, my graphics card is insisting on lowering the resolution of my new monitor to match the resolution of my old monitor, which is 1280×720. This is a bummer since I was hoping to have dual monitors which would have made my life much easier, especially when using Photoshop. I’m going to have to look into this a bit more since I believe I should be able to use different resolutions on two monitors (I know I’ve done it before) but I can’t seem to figure it out right now.

On another note, what the heck’s up (down) with the stock market?!

[edit]
OK, I figured out the problem and now I have two monitors set up as one GIANT monitor! Yay! Also, I am now blind.

Mapping The Future

• by GeekMan • In Announcements, Geek Life, Serious •   0

So, I’m going insane… insane-er.

The reason I haven’t been writing lately is that every time I start writing I make the mistake of looking at news sites or turning on my TV and I see stuff that makes me unable to write anything funny. A real estate meltdown, a presidential debate, a bank collapsing, a failed bailout, etc. No matter what I start writing about it almost always turns into a diatribe on current events, which is something I didn’t want to ever do. So, instead of writing something fun, I just didn’t write anything at all.

But now I’m bored with not writing.

So, in the hopes of getting SOME sort of writing done on this site, I figured I’d allow myself some small amount of serious posts here and in so doing hopefully write other, more funny, stuff all the other times I post. I have no idea what I’ll be saying, but truth be told, I have a lot of topics to choose from so almost anything goes. I’m not saying these ‘other’ posts won’t be funny or silly, I’m still The Mighty Geek, but they might not be.

You have been warned.

Here’s a little something on a more Geeky note. I’ve been playing around with Google Maps for the last day or so, and I’ve created one that I think might be fun. It’s called “Where in the World is GeekMan?” and it’s a map showing all the hotels I’ve stayed at during my travels. Now, it’s FAR from a complete listing since I’ve only included about the last year and a half of my travels, plus a few others that I remembered off the top of my head, but I’ll be adding every place I travel to from now on and marking where I am with a green thumbtack. Plus, I’ll keep adding all the places I’ve been to in the past as soon as I can remember all of them. And hey, if you see a green thumbtack in your neck of the woods, drop me a line! You never know… you might be lucky enough to score a drink with The Mighty Geek!

Ahem.

The drink would be a very manly Virgin Strawberry Daiquiri, of course. With a little pink paper umbrella. And a crazy straw with a loop-dee-loop. And a cherry on top. But no whipped cream, because I’m lactose intolerant. Huh? What do you mean, “Why a daiquiri?” It’s obvious, isn’t it? Because only a real Man can handle such a manly drink, that’s why. And I’m the fricking Mighty Geek, baby. That’s right. You know you like it. Who’s your daddy? Who’s your Daddy?

I am. I am your Daddy. Boo-Yah.