Another Great Idea

While singing “I’ve Got the Soap World on a String” in the shower this morning, after rinsing and before repeating, I had a ‘Great Idea’. Capital G, capital I. Everyone knows that most of the world’s ‘Great Ideas’ were originally thought up while in the shower and this is no exception. I think my idea ranks right up there with such awe inspiring Great Ideas as the Magic 8-Ball, styrofoam coffee cups and sticky notes. I don’t think it’s as good as Olive Loaf, but then again what could possibly top the combination of green olives (with pimentos!) and some form of unidentifiable meat? Some say the guy who invented olive loaf wasn’t right in the head. They say he was insane and I really must agree because he was crazy.

Crazy like a fox.

Anyway, someone out there might actually like this new idea of mine. Now, I know I don’t have a great track record for ‘Great Ideas’ and even though my last idea of breading mini-llamas as pets for apartment-dwelling city aristocrats was stopped by PETA, I think this new idea has merit. Mostly because unlike the time I thought freezing Lake Ontario and turning it into a giant ice-skating rink would be really cool, this new idea is actually doable!

Y’see, I think someone should start a Blog Magazine.

That’s right, a magazine in paper form devoted to online journals, blogs, webcams and the people who maintain them. I see you rolling your eyes out there, but think about it. There’s a built in audience of thousands of bloggers out there who would buy every copy that they could get their wretched, carpal-tunnel, claw-like hands on in the hopes of seeing their blog mentioned somewhere inside. And because we all know that bloggers are attention loving, vain, media-whores they would all try to come up with a gimmick or hook to garner the attention of such a magazine regardless of whether the attention was positive or negative. It would become every bloggers aspiration to get a write-up in the “Blog Review” section of the magazine and once such a goal is accomplished, most bloggers would start an entirely new site just to try again.

Advertisers selling everything from hosting services to branded merchandise to “hip” clothing to webcams would flock to such a magazine. There could be sections in the magazine like Behind the Blog, Webcam Expose and Meme of the Moment. Each blog reviewed could be listed in a yearly special edition. The magazine wouldn’t even need an advertising budget since every blog they wrote about would in turn write about, and link to, the magazine. It would be a viscous circle of linky-love that could only lead to an ever-larger circulation for the magazine.

My god, it would be bigger than Yahoo, Internet Life.

If someone does create this magazine all I ask is for some form of acknowledgement in the masthead and to be reviewed in the first issue. That and 5% of the magazines yearly gross. That’s before taxes people. Don’t get cheap on your poor friend GeekMan once you make it big, or he’ll be forced to hunt you down and beat your fist bloody with his face. And trust me, you wouldn’t like all that blood on your new shirt. It’s very hard to get bloodstains out of material like that.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, the nice men in white coats are here and want me to put on my warm coat that buckles in the back. They seem upset that I haven’t eaten my ‘special’ M&M’s yet and I think they want me to drink the nasty juice that makes my head foggy again. Buh-Bye.