Goodbye cruel world.
This is going to be one very busy month for me, so instead of worrying about my website while I’m working, or trying to be funny during my 60 second lunch break when I haven’t slept in two days, I’m just going to close up shop here until my schedule once again allows me the free time to write more posts. I know you’re upset but I’ll be back as soon…
What the…?
You’re laughing? At me? You think my leaving is funny? What kind of person are you? Oh no, don’t go dabbing at your eyes and making the ‘frowning-almost-crying’ face at me, you faking faker! I know how you really feel now, so let’s be honest and stop with all the acting because now we all know that you don’t really care, right? Right?!
Oh man, that is so cold.
Damn. I mean… damn. Oh man, that hurts. Really. It feels like you just put a fricking salt-water-and-lemon-juice icicle in my eye, you know? I mean, you could have pretended. You could have lied to me and told me you cared and only laughed at me after I was gone. But noooo, you had to rip out my damn heart right here in public, didn’t you? Right in front of all your friends so you’d look all macho and stuff, huh? Well guess what?! You aren’t macho! You’re not even cool! And I hate you!
Hate you! Hate you! Hate you!!!
[wiping tears]
*sniff*
Get that tissue out of my face.
*sniff*
I’m not listening to you. You’re a liar.
*sniffle*
Well, I want to believe you…
[blowing nose]
You mean it? You promise? You’re not pulling my chain, right? Really? Really?! Oh wow! I never thought you ever felt that way! What are you doing…? Oh! Oh. My. God. It’s beautiful! OMG! I don’t know what to say! Oh! Yes! YES! Oh wow, I’ve got to call my mom…
Hey, do I need to change my last name?
Don’t worry about us. We’ll be fine. *sniff* You go off and do whatever the hell it is you do when you’re not entertaining us. I’m sure it’s WAAAAAAAY more important than we are. *sniff*
No…please don’t worry about changing your last name…Geek is sorta cute.
You can’t break up with us if we break up with you first.
*Fist Shaking*
*Much Fist Shaking*
I’ll get you for this. Leaving in the dead of winter when we need The Mighty Geek funny the most.
Sigh.
Listen, I think we need to see other people. It’s not me, it’s you.
It’s just not working out….
But, but ….
cool, I need to clean out some of my defunct links from my bookmarks. best of luck.
I’m still trying to figure out how to make a salt-water and lemon juice icicle, but then I’m easily distracted …
Oh yeah – – –
sob, sob, sniff (wipe eyes with back of shirt sleeve)