Sweet joy.
My new computer, christened ‘GunBuster’ this morning, is a fully functional thing of beauty. She’s got all 512 MB of RAM that I ordered, too. I can’t begin to explain to you how thrilling it is to turn on my computer and not need to bring a book to read while it boots up. I’m serious. I used to read a chapter each time my old computer crashed and if I needed to reconfigure something I made sure to have War and Peace handy.
Unabridged.
The only thing that gives me the willies is that due to work requirements, I had to get WinXP installed. WinXP looks ok, I guess, and everything works pretty well so far, but I hate the fact that this little balloon keeps popping up telling me I’ve only got 25 days left to ‘Activate’ my copy of WinXP. Apparently, I can do this by contacting Micro$oft and giving them full access to my computer and all of its files.
Wait, another balloon just popped up…
This one says that since I’m such a Geek, in addition to the regular electronic, internet based product activation, I also need to send a self addressed stamped envelope to Micro$soft with the following materials; my name, address, phone number, age, stool sample, DNA sample, penis size, drivers license, social security number, sexual preference, mothers maiden name, all of my credit card numbers, deed to my home or signed apartment lease, my first born child/favorite pet/sexual partner, and a signed contract stating that I have never and will never install Linux on any computer I ever purchase under penalty of death.
I must also purchase a solid gold Bill Gates idol and spend 3 hours a day licking his golden anus.
Micro$soft is quick to assure me that all of this is necessary for the stability and well being of my computer. They are only trying to protect me and others like me from unscrupulous hackers who are out to pirate Micro$oft software, and thus my personal files, in an all out effort to take over the world. Micro$oft is confident that only criminals or little mice with genius IQ’s would ever try to pirate software for such nefarious reasons, and so they know I’ll be a good consumer and do whatever they tell me to do. No matter how outlandish, invasive or downright stupid it may seem at the time.
Well, that sounds perfectly legal to me.
Anywaste, tonight I’m going to sit in front of GunBuster and simply bask in the glow of its (haven’t decided if it’s a girl or a boy, yet.) extra-bright, blinking, blue LED power indicators. Then I think I’ll go to bed and dream of having enough money to buy the PhotoShop and Macromedia upgrades that I so desperately want. And, just so you’ll understand how much of a loser I am, I’ve actually taken a picture of GunBuster so all of you can become properly jealous of my awesome, L337 ©0mpµ73®.
I’m such a pathetic Geek, aren’t I?
i am properly jealous. also, i think it’s a girl just because it’s so pretty.
Oh my, I think my panties just dropped. That’s a sweet machine ya got there GeekMan. But I think it’s a boy, after all, it’s got blue lights.
Very sexy, Geeky!! This is no girl, kids. This is a woman. Beautiful, sexy, powerful, multi-tasking, sleek, efficient — shall I continue?
I’ll continue Astone : expensive, certainly has it’s own will, goes beserk on you every now and then… definately female!
Geekman : if you want to give as few info as possible to M$, go for the phone activation. Much more secure.
Only 512 MB Ram? Thats not very geeky.. Id have thought the full Gig would be true to geek form.
there are ways around the Micro$oft activation, if you’d care to know them… ;)
heh its pretty nice…its shit compared to my pc though
(via psp) XP on start up uses a good 150 MB of RAM so useing the PC takes that to 180 – 250 so 512 is good 740 better but 1024 and up are uneeded EXp gameing and imgeing